Quotes dating players
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However, these men are often punished by being socially labeled as "jerks", "players", or even "creeps", unfit for socially-defined relationships.
Given that, many men sit on the couch, plug in a video game, and opt out—just as Behaviorism and Skinner might predict.When punishments weight more heavily, people avoid those same behaviors.Essentially, many men report that they find modern dating a primarily punishing affair.Men often define these women along evolutionary psychology lines—women who are sexually-selective, faithful, physically attractive, and have a pleasant, respectful disposition (for more on these qualities, see Buss, 2003 and my own articles here and here).Unfortunately, these qualities are again part of women's double bind, with social norms sometimes guiding them away from these biologically feminine characteristics.Again though, men pursuing this strategy also report the need to stay vigilant for their partner's waning attraction, signs of cheating, and being taken for granted (much as women in "traditional" relationships do).
With divorce a very real (and punishing) possibility, these men may also choose to think carefully before committing.
2) Partnering Carefully - another strategy adopted by some men is to adhere to social norms and become a "good guy" or even "domestic partner". However, men who follow this strategy should pick their partner carefully.
Men successful with this strategy attempt to find an honest and faithful partner, who respects their needs, and is grateful for their contributions (for more, see here, here, and here).
Men have adapted and devised a number of strategies to make the best of these difficult options, including the following: 1) Becoming Attractive - one strategy adopted by some men is to become attractive, dominant, and sexually-forward.
These are the guys who are often labeled "players", "macks", and "pick-up artists".
We are all motivated to seek out rewards and avoid punishments (Skinner, 1974).